F (Farewell!) 2016 | Handel Group

F (Farewell!) 2016

Yes.  It’s that time of year:  THE END OF IT.

And even though I truly had many great accomplishments this year (i.e. a full time job with HG, a book I helped write, another animated TV show in the works, and a tummy tuck I’ve been threatening for 20 years), 2016 still managed to end with a thud for many of us (read: election).

In fact, its end reminded me of the time in my life when I, a native New Yorker, moved to Florida for a stint and forfeited my right to ever make fun of New Jersey again. Only now, not only gone are my Jersey jokes, I’ve now lost the right to look anyone outside of the U.S. straight in the eye.

Come on.  Even for his hair alone…

Okay.  All that aside.  I’m going to finish this year as I LOVE to finish all years, with a large bonfire to burn last year’s WTFs and a heap of new promises to start 2017 off right.  That’s right. It’s New Year’s resolution time.

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This is the year I, no shift, promise to do (or more so, stop doing) the following:

  1. I am going to stop calling my generous, loving, and handsome husband “fat” when he reaches for something delicious, uh, I made.
  2. I am going to stop saying “yes” to more things than I deem I can handle and then blame the asker and not my yes-er as the problem.
  3. I’m going to stop growling at the photographer taking my picture and wonder why the photos don’t come out so great.
  4. I am going to stop getting dressed to go for a run, never going, and then pointing at  emails, kids (who aren’t home) and laundry (that I’m not doing) for why I didn’t run and not my very own inner-brat.
  5. I am going to stop jokingly calling my 16-year-old a ‘skank’ and then teary-eyed wonder why she doesn’t tell me what’s going on in her life.
  6. I am going to stop dry heaving and rolling my eyes at words like, “chill” and “flow” and not get the joke that the reason I burp up bile at them is because they should really be on my 2017 list of to do’s or better yet, to be’s.
  7. I am going to start to try to consider that thumbing songs up and down while driving counts as texting. YES. No matter how vital it is to the Pandora station I’m creating or to Tracy Chapman staying in the 80s.
  8. I’m going to give up the right to be randomly annoyed by people and think it’s their problem and not my DNA.
  9. Hi, Dad!
  10. I am going to see the sudden need to listen to the Smiths as not a great sign for my mood.
  11. I am going to get great at taking notes even if the person giving them has been deemed annoying (see promise #8) by my dad and/or me.
  12. I am going to remember my mom is 80 and stop being surprised when as cute as she is (and she is), she’s a little crazy (read: bad bulldog she likes more than my less bad dad).  She’s earned it. What’s my excuse?
  13. I’m going to stop emailing while preparing dinner and then get mad at anyone who so much as bats an eyelash as to why the chicken skin is now a carcinogen. 
  14. I’m going to stop complaining about winter in the winter.  It seems, it might not help.
  15. I’m going to stop saying that Shavasana is my favorite yoga pose.
  16. Even though it is.

(20)17.  I’m going to promise to stop making promises like #6, #14,  and #15 which I have no intent whatsoever to keep. The rest, I’m in.

Your turn.


P.S. If you truly want to F (free!) yourself, get a jump-start and pre-order our new book Maybe It’s You from The Handel Method® Creator, Lauren Zander. Changing the world, one human at a time and wherever books are sold. Ships April 4, 2017.