I have news.
Very good news.
A big dream of mine is coming true. I want to teach as many people as possible how to fight for their dreams and tell the whole truth about themselves: what they dream of, how they feel, who they are. About four years ago, I decided (with a big nudge from my Handel coach Lauren Zander) that one of the best ways to do that was through TV, and thus began a very long journey of many failures, lots of learning, a bunch of fun and some success. I appeared on an MTV special two seasons ago, which thrilled me, and I haven’t had a TV appearance since.
A few days ago, I found out that I am back on TV. This time it’s even better. My husband Will and I are appearing together, as life coaches on the 90-minute A&E special “The Marriage Test.” We will be helping couples figure out if they should stay together, and if they do, how to make it work. That’s our dream topic! To put the proverbial cherry on top, on Friday, we’ll be interviewed on the “Dr. Phil Show.” Our TV special is his project, after all, so he has a vested interest in its success. Lucky us. Or is it luck?
I believe in luck, but I also think we make our own luck. And we make our own luck by adhering to the principles of Personal Integrity®. Here is how to do that:
1) DARE TO TELL YOUR TRUTH ABOUT YOUR DREAM
My heart has always raced at the thought of making the world a better place. It’s always been my passion to use my story and training as an example of “agony to triumph” to help other people live according to their own ideals and have more love and peace in their lives. I have always done this on a small scale. The TV dream however, takes it to a big scale.
Daring to tell my truth about the dream was really hard for me since my “chicken” voice was screaming so loud in my ears, telling me NOT to want a dream like TV. It has so many excellent-sounding reasons:
• You’ll have to get used to rejection
• It takes forever
• It’s pretty grueling work that often involves travel
• You could mess it up in so many ways
• And of course the most obvious: EVERYONE WILL SEE YOU (and judge you)!
My body physically rebelled at the thought of this: I broke out in hives and adult acne.
2) BUST YOUR EXCUSES
In order to get into alignment with your highest ideals, you can’t listen to voices of fear as though they are intelligent and helpful. So I had to call all the above reasons not to do TV BS and actually just work to keep my fear at bay. I shifted my mindset to being impressed that I would dream big enough to have fear and that made me welcome it more, which reduced its negative impact.
If the truth is that I was afraid, the antidote was making a plan of action and sticking to it. That plan of action included: many hours of media coaching, practicing on camera, talking to everyone I could in the TV industry, getting involved with a significant number of production companies and possible projects, writing many treatments, making sizzle reels and ultimately taping shows. And of course a lot of mediating, manifesting and prayer! At Handel, how we handle action is by designing promises for ourselves. I have been in action for four years.
But remember, it’s not really about hard work. It’s about believing. Nobody can ever tell you how you’re going to get to your dream. The universe is too creative and infinite to settle on the one particular path that you might think is the right one. My road to TV went nothing like I thought it would. I recommend keeping a very open mind about HOW your dream will come true while being VERY diligent and precise about the steps you take.
What do you think? How does this apply to you?